Ants In Your Pants

I recently set out on an all night cat fishing trip with my cousin lee, also in attendance were the wives. My wife loves to fish and enjoys each trip we take, while lee’s wife is till getting used to idea of fishing. She never really fished before and she is not really the outdoors type, but we are working to change that.

It was a hot sticky night, we had just had a tremendous rainfall and the water levels were at an all time high. The fishing pier we normally night fish from was underwater, we had to stand at the boat ramps and make due. We wanted to fish so we weren’t going to let a little rain stop us.

One thing we didn’t count on was the fire ant population that had gathered due to the high water levels. We were being eaten alive by these nasty little pests so we sent the women to go get some ant spray from the local gas station, big mistake that was. They returned with raid wasp and hornet spray, we both laughed until they told us it cost $8 for the can. Eight dollars! What a rip that was, future note never buy insect spray from a gas station. We had to laugh about it until we were interrupted by an onslaught from the swarming ants, what a pain in the *** they were.

We decided to stand in the water to fish for a while; the ants had other ideas though. We figured being in knee deep water would be sufficient, but it wasn’t, the ants were going to get to us no matter what. They would latch onto floating branches and leaves; they found a way to keep biting us. We were not going to get discouraged though, it was early and the bite was yet to come, so we thought.

The only bite that ever came our way was followed by several more from the local fire ant population. The fishing was very dull that night, but we the ants made sure we didn’t leave empty handed. They were all over us, even on the way home. I had to stop the truck a few times and remove ants from not so comfortable places. I thing anyone who has ever camped out or fished in poor conditions understands where i'm coming from.

The is nothing more annoying than having an angry heard of fire ants find their way down your pants and into your nether regions. Not a pretty sight when everyone around you is grabbing themselves and picking their butts while cussing the day fire ants were created. Oh well its all part of the experience as they say, what an experience we had, one we will never be able to forget.

Lee’s wife who is new to all of this couldn’t understand why we would put ourselves through this ordeal. We looked at each other, picked ants out of private places and laughed. What else can you do but laugh, she stood there shaking her head as we continued on our way.